I had a dream;
I was shopping with some beautiful girlfriends for dresses. We were looking at very shiny happy sparkly dresses, quite mod and colorful really. And a few hats, with feathers, fit for a princess.
Then amidst all these happy things I remembered Paul and that he was dead and how much I missed him and how I wished he were still here. I went barreling down a hallway sobbing...fearing the loss of more loved ones and friends.
How could I go on? Go forward in the face of that inevitable loss? I cried some more, than went back to my girlfriends who were still looking at fun, happy dresses. Somehow, I knew, even with the sadness, I would face the loss and go forward. Even in the presence of dichotomy; happy dress and smiling girlfriends and brutal loss.
I would always be marked in this way, but in time we all are. And we all move forward, touching the nice things still.